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Fuck the muscle milk, JP’s got a birthday candy blowout on this week’s Mailbag! Just how many peanuts, Oreos and honeybuns can one mawfacka eat? Also: What is the mystery shit that can’t be opened on air?
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Attn: Mailbag
Swearnet.com Incorporated
PO Box 38072 Burnside
Dartmouth NS B3B 1X2
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Ricky and Bubbles are in bacon-wrapped Heaven on this week’s Park After Dark! Julian’s on a strictly liquor diet, but he probably won’t end up on the shitter all night! Also: Bubbles’ goat impressions, house-proud tarantulas, and the most eco-friendly way to get rid of a body!
Due to the promoters not fulfilling their contractual obligations, we have been forced to cancel our appearance at the Rock The Roses ‘Hair In The Fair’ Festival in Welland, Ontario on Friday, July 12. We’re very sorry to fans that planned to see us there, but hope to be back that way soon.
Any questions about the festival can be directed to the promoter at rocktheroses.ca.
There’s three sexy-as-fuck packages in the Mailbag this week! The Boys receive fancy hemp oil treats, quail eggs and beaver nuggets, plus a book for not pulling your goalie to… now there’s a fucking challenge! Also: Has Robb won $2.5 million in a scratchcard lottery?
On this week’s Park After Dark: Ricky’s blue because his bank heist went to shit last night – literally! Thank fuck Bubbles and Julian – and a big TPB fan – have something to cheer him up. The Boys also invent Cottonloaf cupcakes, discuss a greasy new perfume, and admire Bubbles’ Meat Man!
This week on Mailbag: It’s raining cats and cocks in the SwearNet studio, but the Boys don’t give a fuck as they’ve got hard rock, booger beans and dirty ol’ lobster in a can! Plus: A big package for Ricky Lafleur!
Wanna send something for the show? Send it to:
Attn: Mailbag
Swearnet.com Incorporated
PO Box 38072 Burnside
Dartmouth NS B3B 1X2
CANADA
We receive fucksacks full of Mailbag submissions every week so please be patient, we’ll get to yours eventually!
It’s been a while… a long fuckin’ while… but SOTU is BACK!! The Boys reveal the set for a new SwearNet show, and have news about the Animated Series, Mike’s recent fundraiser, and partying at Hair in the Fair!
It’s time for a new, hash jello-fuelled episode of Park After Dark!! Ricky’s been browsing the True section of the bookstore, and has been getting learnt about paranormal pets! Did Bubbles really own a book-reading kitty? Also: A muscleman with more muscles than Julian, chickens that are really pancakes, and a spider that gives you a boner! Holy fuck, that jello was strong…
Heather the samsquamptch is BACK at SwearNet!! Since we last saw Heather roaming the greasy streets of LA, she’s moved on and is living her best life, dealing with romance, shaving, and trying not to shit on the kitchen floor. Unfortunately she’s picked up a few bad habits…
On the latest Park After Dark: Ricky’s constructed the world’s cutest cheese and bologny sammich – but are you supposed to eat it or burp it?! Also: Getting fucked up on nutmeg, the sweet taste of beaver ass juice, and how to make a bunch of scrilla from a melon!
