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Vodka enemas, mega THC gummies – holy shit, Park After Dark is getting fucked up today! The Boys chat about a really shitty doctor, fucked Christmas gifts, and how to bang a mermaid.
Also: Mark your calendars for December 17 – the Boys have something special for ya…
Happy Wednesday fuckers, we’ve got a NEW show for ya! Josh Prior (of Greenmount fame) invites his two buddies for a trivia/drinking game on the first episode of GUY TIMES! It’s a battle of wits and liquor shots – grab a bottle and play the fuck along!
Buy one, get eight free! Due to an ‘error’ at the drive-thru, Ricky has collected chicken fingers from the King, KFC, Harvey’s, A&W and… well, every fucking fast food joint in Sunnyvale! Smash open those dipping sauces and let the taste test chicken party begin!
On this week’s bag-busting Mailbag: The Boys get a Saturday night puzzle challenge, hoop-busting holy hot sauce, and try the ultimate hot chip! Also: Wanna hire the Boys? That’ll be ONE MILLION DOLLARS!
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PLEASE NOTE: If sending from outside of Canada, please mark as ‘GIFT’ because we can’t keep paying import duty and all that Customs shit. FIFTY FUCKIN’ DOLLARS?!!
Alright fuckers, here are the results of our BIGGEST EVER Trailer Park Boys Halloween dress-up contest! Thanks to over 500 of you glorious fuckers who entered on SwearBlog, Instagram, Twitter and TikTok. It’s been hard as fuck to pick the winners, but after weeks of wrangling, arguing, getting high and forgetting who we fucking voted for, here is the GRAND PRIZE MEGA PACK WINNER – and bless my fuck, there are TWO!
TA-DAAAAAA!
Congratulations to little mawfks Julian and Ricky, and a 131-proof, straight up fuckin’ wasted Jim Lahey and his shirtless circus sidekick. The Boys couldn’t agree on the best, so before a fuckin’ fight broke out at the SwearNet studio we decided you BOTH win a mega prize pack!
But wait, there’s more! There were also a bunch of runners-up, who all win one-year subscriptions to SwearNet.com, and the bragging rights for-fucking-EVER:
Congratulations to Randy and his bluejay burger, the Shed ‘n’ Breakfast houseparty, Bubbles impersonator (our first ever video winner), Green Bastard, Medieval Trailer Park Boys, Bubbles, Mustard Tiger, Ricky, TPB three-fer (plus a cute Conky!) and Julian! We’ll be in touch soon, fuckers!
Check out the gallery below for the winning photo entries, and @buzzedandblazed on TikTok for the winning video!
Ricky’s dressed up smart today, he’s got a job interview – but is he qualified? (Clue: fuck no!) The Boys chat about the million-dollar kitty, banging in church, and a fucked finger-free business plan! Also: Julian don’t want to talk about ass play… but he does!
What’s in the bulging Bag this week? Beaver cleaning advice from a good Samaricunt, vintage Monty Python, and fucked flavour chips for charity! Also: Rudi’s XXX-rated package!
On today’s wired Park After Dark – Cat TV with Bubbles, Julian’s greasy Google searches, and the most fucked news of the week! Also: Did Julian help create the world’s most jacked potato?
Remembering our dear Marguerite McNeil, who has sadly passed away. Your Sunnyvale family will miss you so much! Pour a drink, grab some (crispy) bacon and enjoy some of Marguerite’s best moments… ❤️
Do you hear that, Randiban? No, it’s no the Winds of Shit. Listen to The Liquor! What does The Liquor tell you?
When you can hear a bottle of vodka talking to you, you truly are The Liquor #TPB20
