New at swearnet.com

New on swearnet.com – Go Big or Leave Home

The Boys discuss the Lorena Bobbit incident of 1993

Ricky secretly snuck a fuckload of hash into Bubbles’ cookies just before the Boys shot the latest episode of the Trailer Park Boys Podcast, and holy fuck does Bubbles ever go into outer space!

Before the hash kicks in, the Boys discuss the most painful things that has ever happened to them (Baby Mo shooting Ricky in the balls was actually only his second-most painful incident).  This ties nicely into the 24th anniversary of Lorena Bobbitt hacking off her husband’s cock, and the Boys try to figure out how exactly she did it, and which instruments she might’ve used.

It’s also the anniversary of the first-ever message sent into space for potential reception by aliens, which leads the Boys to wonder if aliens exist.  Bubbles claims they absolutely exist, and they’re already here on Earth.  He even suggests that Trevor was an alien and the reason he is not around anymore is because the Tall Whites beamed him back up!

Ricky, Julian, and Bubbles also discuss David Letterman (or Lettermen), My Sharona, the CN Tower, Richie Rich, Casper the Ghost, and a fuck ton of other random shit on Episode 98 of the podcash!

As per fucking usual, this episode is brought to you by the dicks at TrailerParkBoysMerch.com!

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New on swearnet.com – Offworld Cookery Returns!

The Offworld Cookery dicks have a table this time!

It’s been two years since we’ve seen these dicks on SwearNet, but Offworld Cookery is back with a new season!  And in the season premiere, Paul, Chico, and Alessandro actually have a fucking table this time!

The food cocks from Northern England have transformed themselves into a pack of posh cunts with a stunning menu that brings fine dining to the great outdoors.  Take a delightful romp through the some of the finest fresh spring flavours imaginable, including lobster, monkfish, and lemon jizz!

Stay tuned til the end – these fine English gentleman seem to misplace their manners and things turn ugly!

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New on swearnet.com – Cocks

The Boys discuss the size of MC Hammer's hammer

On episode 97 of the Trailer Park Boys Podcast, the Boys are talking about the size of various things — walrus cocks, bear cocks, MC Hammer’s cock, and the measurable universe!

While they are on the topic of the universe, Ricky wonders if Neil Armstrong had any immigration issues when he went to the moon.  Ricky also delves into his dirty fucking methods for oil changes and waste disposal.

PLUS: What would make fried chicken better?  Cocaine, that’s what!

This episode of the podcash is brought to you by the pricks at TrailerParkBoysMerch.com!  Check out the brand-fuckin-new Green Bastard hoodie!

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New on swearnet.com – Fuckin’ Modern Technology!

Julian answers fan questions

On today’s episode of Dear Julian, we get some advice on surviving an early-mid-life crisis, how to trick the stupid fucking cops that pull you over for smoking dope, and how to advertise greasy new bars!

We also get Julian’s take on modern fuckin technology.  How is it impacting his line of work?  What are his opinions of hackers?  Now that everyone has goddamn cameras in their pockets, is it hard to pull off greasy shit?

PLUS: We learn some serious rum lessons, particularly when it comes to driving!

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New on swearnet.com – From Worse to Badder

Ricky tries to clean up a spill on the Trailer Park Boys Podcast

Holy fuck, the Boys should’ve worn rain jackets on this week’s episode of the Trailer Park Boys Podcast!  There are spills-a-plenty, and nothing is safe, not even Bubbles’ laptop!

But there was an upside to the numerous spills on the podcash – Ricky learned about absorption.  He came into podcash 96 thinking that plastic was a suitable material for cleaning up spills.  After plenty of denial and error on this episode, he arrives at paper towel.

The Boys also discuss the Flat-Earther movement, comprised of fucking morons who think that the Earth is indeed flat, surrounded by an ice wall (to keep in the ocean water), and covered by a dome.  Well, you may or may not be surprised to learn that one of the three Boys on this podcast is a member of this fucking moronic movement, and his name rhymes with Dickey.

PLUS: If Randy “Macho Man” Savage’s bare balls and cock touched an old pair of his ring trunks, does that add value?

This week’s soaking wet episode of the podcash is brought to you by TrailerParkBoysMerch.com!

 

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New on swearnet.com – Menu Tasting, Part Fucking 2

The Boys taste test new menu items for their restaurant

Despite some pretty fucking severe protest, Mike manages to drag Robb and JP out of the writing room and into a test kitchen on this week’s episode of The Real Fucking Reality Show.

On last week’s episode, Mike revealed that he and the Boys purchased the legendary Halifax hang-out known as the Economy Shoe Shop.  Unfortunately, the timing absolute dog shit because they are under the gun to finish writing Trailer Park Boys Season 12 and they don’t exactly have time to be fucking around with a restaurant.

This week, Boys go to a test kitchen so that they can try every single fucking thing on the 45-item menu. Good news, the feedback is positive!

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New on swearnet.com – It’s for the Liquor

We pay Julian in liquor and he answers questions for us

On today’s episode of Dear Julian, Julian reveals his true feelings about answering all of your fucky questions for this show: it’s less about your problems, and more about the bottle of rum we give him after each episode.

He offers advice on parenting, threesomes, and the best ways to get fucked up when your broke.  Julian also answers fan questions about his hobbies, whether or not he is a fighter, and if he has ever tried a rum bong.

PLUS: What’s the longest amount of time Julian has gone between drinks?  Find out in this episode!

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New on swearnet.com – Mailbag #TPB12 Contest Winners!

The Boys choose their favourite items in the Mailbag

The “Help Us Decorate Sunnyvale” contest has come to an end, and the Boys are picking their favourites on the latest episode of Mailbag!

A few episodes ago, a slightly buzzed Mike Smith suddenly came up with the fucking idea of holding a contest whereby you dicks send shit into the Mailbag and the Boys would would pick their favourite 10 items and use them to decorate the set of Trailer Park Boys Season 12.

The Boys didn’t expect such an overwhelming fucking response.  They got a fuckload of DECENT shit!  So much, they had to do an extra-long episode and they even needed a bit of help from Sarah Dunsworth!

Cocks, swords, bubbles, dandelion crayons, oh my!

There was so much amazing shit that the Boys decided they will use EVERYTHING to help decorate the set of Season 12, except for anything that has copyrighted material on it (sorry Rudi).  They did pick their 10 favourites though, and the senders of those cocksuckers will receive a free year of SwearNet!

 

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New on swearnet.com – If It’s Broke, Don’t Fix It

Ricky describes what he would do if he was a sting ray

Cover your chair in bubble wrap, sit back, and enjoy the latest episode of the award-winning Trailer Park Boys Podcast, only on SwearNet.com!

It’s been 13 years since Ken Jennings began his legendary Jeopardy! winning streak, and Bubbles has dug up the original set of questions from the June 2, 2004 episode to see if Ricky and Julian can go toe-to-toe with Jennings!

They also celebrate the anniversary of the 1875 event in which Alexander Graham Bell got the fuckin’ ball rolling on the telephone (an invention still used to this day), and Ricky also tips his hat to some macaroni fuck who had something to do with the radio.

The Boys discuss Halifax apology beers, Ferrari vending machines, and surgical whales.  PLUS: If you’ve ever wondered how Ricky would behave as a sting ray, you’re in fuckin’ luck!

This episode of the podcash is brought to you by TrailerParkBoysMerch.com!  Buy our shit!

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