A few episodes ago, a slightly buzzed Mike Smith suddenly came up with the fucking idea of holding a contest whereby you dicks send shit into the Mailbag and the Boys would would pick their favourite 10 items and use them to decorate the set of Trailer Park Boys Season 12.
The Boys didn’t expect such an overwhelming fucking response. They got a fuckload of DECENT shit! So much, they had to do an extra-long episode and they even needed a bit of help from Sarah Dunsworth!
Cocks, swords, bubbles, dandelion crayons, oh my!
There was so much amazing shit that the Boys decided they will use EVERYTHING to help decorate the set of Season 12, except for anything that has copyrighted material on it (sorry Rudi). They did pick their 10 favourites though, and the senders of those cocksuckers will receive a free year of SwearNet!
Ya know that perfect level of being stoned? Ricky achieved it on Friday as the Boys celebrated the launch of Season 11 on Netflix! The Boys are so excited about the new season, they’re giving away some authentic shit from Sunnyvale! Check out the contest page to learn how you could win a jar of Bubbles Pizza Sauce, a “Ricky’s Ball Hockey Camp” poster, and a rum glass straight from Julian’s cupboard!
PLUS: The Boys have a fucked-up conversation about Mr. Hockey, Mr. Sub, Mr. Lube, and a few other misters. For fuck sakes, leave Gordie Howe out of this, Boys!
Though Ricky’s worried that the camera dicks might’ve made him look like an idiot again, the Boys have been eagerly anticipating the March 31st release date on Netflix. So much, that they are giving away some of THEIR shit from Sunnyvale! Check out the official contest page to find out how you can win a jar of Bubbles Pizza Sauce, a “Ricky’s Ball Hockey Camp” poster, and a LEGIT Julian rum glass!
Since this is such a DECENT day in the Boys’ calendar, they decided to find out what other DECENT things happened on this day, and they discuss the construction of the Eiffel Tower (which Ricky disputes), Wrestlemania, and the rise to power of a certain dickhead with a moustache.
They also get into a totally fucked conversation about Mr. Hockey, Mr. Sub, Mr. Lube, Mr. Clean, and a few other fucked up misters.
On March 31st, the whole fuckin’ world will feel the NEED FOR WEED as Trailer Park Boys Season 11 hits Netflix!
We want to see how YOU cocksuckers are celebrating the new season! Whether you’re with your dickhead friends, or on your own with nine cans of ravioli, we want pictures of your Need for Weed #TPB11 Viewing Partyand we’ll be giving out prizes for our favourites!
Three runners-up will get some DECENT swag from TrailerParkBoysMerch.com, but the grand prize winner will get something money can’t buy – real-deal shit from the set of Trailer Park Boys Season 11!
You’ll get an authentic “Ricky’s Ball Hockey” poster, a jar of Bubbles’ “Scrumpdilly Organico Pizza Sauce” (this is just a prop, for fuck sakes, it’ll probably make you sick as fuck, don’t eat the shit), and we even stole one of Julian’s sexy rum glasses from the dirty dancer himself! We’ll also throw in an autographed 8×10 photo of the Boys.
Celebrate the patron saint of PARTS UNKNOWN by dressing up like the Green Bastard this March 17th, or as we like to call it, St. Green Bastard’s Day!
Submit a photo of your Green Bastard outfit (head-to-toe full-bastard or even just a mask or GB t-shirt), and you’ll be entered into a random draw to win a Liquormen’s t-shirt. Because you KNOW that Liquormen’s is the official whisky of St. Green Bastard’s Day!
Holy FUCK it’s colder than a witch’s tit in Sunnyvale these days!
Lahey is on the booze just for the “liquor jacket” effect, and Ricky is hot-boxing Bubbles’ shed mainly to keep warm!
We are running a contest to find out how YOU stay #SunnyvaleWarm! Comment on our social media posts using the hashtag #SunnyvaleWarm, or you can also put your whore of an answer in the comment section below. The contest runs til Sunday, January 15th at midnight EST!
The dicks at SwearNet will pick our favourite post and mail out a DECENT Sunnyvale Bobble Hat and a Trailer Park Boys scarf! If you’re worried you won’t win, or you’re too fucking lazy to come up with something funny, these two cocksuckers are on sale this weekend at our merch store so you can just buy the pricks yourself!
With the whore of a year of 2016 behind us, we are now rolling a six-paper joint and looking forward to 2017. Season 11 will be unleashed in all of its greasy glory on Netflix (date to-be-fucking-announced), and Canadians coast-to-coast will be able to put their dirty lips on a can of Freedom 35, the best shitty beer ever made!
But what’s in store for the residents of Sunnyvale in 2017? Will Bubbles meet a GREASY lady and take her back to his shed? Will Randy switch to vegan burgers? Will Jacob and Trinity get bornt a new gramson or gramdaughter for Ricky? Will Lahey maintain a 10/10 drunk the entire year?
We want YOUR predictions for the people of Sunnyvale in 2017!
Use the hashtag #TPB2017 on Instagram or Twitter, or leave a comment on Facebook, and the dicks at SwearNet will pick their three favourite predictions and send out some fucking prizes!
It’s cold as fuck in Sunnyvale right now so we figure each winner should get a TPB beanie to keep their heads warm, and a TPB lighter leash to keep their joints warm!
Hurry the fuck up, you have until Monday, January 9th at midnight to submit your predictions!
Bubbles mixes up his patented Liquor-Nogs (complete with a crushed candy cane rim job) and Ricky demonstrates the answer to all of NASA’s problems: The Shitsucker 3000.
Despite Julian being a grumpy bastard with better things to do, the Boys exchange presents and they even open up some curiously sexy gifts from a secret drunk trailer park supervisor Santa!
Ricky shows off some of his hand-made declorations, and encourages you dickhead fans to enter his Gettin’ Declorated with Ricky contest! Take a pic of your do-it-your-fucking-self orlaments, wreets, or whatever, and if we like it, you’ll win a DECENT prize pack!
It’s that time of year again – everyone’s going fucking crazy, spending money on all kinds of bullshit. Luckily, Ricky put together an upcoming episode of Gettin’ Learnt with Ricky to help inspire you to save money with some great DIFY (do it your fucking self) decorating options!
The dicks at SwearNet want to see YOUR greasy Sunnyvale-style orlaments, wreets, gingy-bread houses, or whatever the fuck declorations you feel like making. Take a pic and upload it here! You can also tag it on Instagram with the hashcoin, er, hashtag #TPBxmas.