Tag Archive for swearnet

New on swearnet.com – A Sack Full of Nuts

Mike Smith is blowing a smoke bubble

It’s the Mailbag, mother fuckers!  The Boys get a deeeecent haul in this episode, highlighted by a GREASY Randy gut ring from Big Joe’s Biker Rings!

They also get a fuck load of candy from Sweden, space gifts, mixed nuts, and a birthday card (WITH LIQUOR CASH) for Mike.  Perhaps the most fucked up thing they receive is a mystery box full of suspicious oils and powders – is someone out to poison the Boys, or are looks deceiving?!

And this is a public service announcement to Mike – JP’s mom DOES watch this fucking show, so watch your goddamn mouth!

If you want to send some shit to the Mailbag (with absolutely NO guarantee that it’ll be opened in any kind of a timely fucking fashion), use this address:

Attn: Mailbag
Swearnet.com Incorporated
PO Box 38072 Burnside
Dartmouth NS B3B 1X2
CANADA

Share this shit! Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on RedditShare on Google+Share on TumblrShare on StumbleUponPin on Pinterest

The Greasiest Photo of Them All

The winner of the Greasy outdoors contest!

It’s been a greasy month but it’s over – after three weeks of photo submissions and one week of voting, The Greasy Outdoors contest has a winner!

The winning photo was sent by Tina T (pictured above, Dumpster Tanner) and her greasy “Usual Suspects“: John “Johnny Bags” (Dumpster Diver); Chase (Dumpster King); Wade (Dumpster Feaster), and photographer Jeff.

For Tina, using a dumpster wasn’t just a greasy idea for a photo contest, it was a throw back to a few fucked up memories from her childhood.

“My mom was the Dumpster Queen,” recalls Tina.  “She’s Mexican-Irish, so she thinks finding a good dumpster haul is thrifty and smart, not trash diving. If my mom gives you something and doesn’t tell you where she got it… it was from the dumpster. She’ll say that she ‘found it’, but we all know.”

Tina’s mom provided some fucking fantastic inspiration because the dumpster photo crushed the competition — nearly 400 other photos were vying to be the greasiest of them all.  But it didn’t come without challenges.

“I scouted all of Burbank, CA to find an open dumpster where no one would bug us,” says Tina.  “Did you know most people lock their fucking trash AND they have mall dicks guarding it?  Luckily, I found a sweet spot and the security guard came over just as we were cleaning up. We got the fuck out of there before he got to us!”

Tina is taking home a DECENT prize pack of SwearNet swag, and she already has plans to celebrate.

“You know I’m gonna have a SwearNet/TPB party for my Usual Suspects,” says Tina.  “I’ll cook for them in my Dirty Burger apron (and nothing else), change into my Green Bastard shirt for the party and wear the fuck out of the SwearNet hat–and I don’t usually wear hats over this big curly hair, but that fucker is awesome!”

She’ll also get a free one-year subscription to SwearNet, and she’s pretty fuckin’ excited about that, too.

“I love so many SwearNet shows! Not kissing ass here, how would that help me now? The Trailer Park Boys Podcast is the best around. Period. And I’m a podcast whore, so I know. Also, I’m cuckoo-bananas for The Jim Lahey Show with Randy, Gettin’ Learnt and Guitar Lessons with Bubbles. The OWC guys are a fucking delight, as well.”

Congrats to Tina, you fucking earned it!  And many thanks to the many fuckers who sent in their fucking photos.  Fuckin’ DECENT!

Share this shit! Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on RedditShare on Google+Share on TumblrShare on StumbleUponPin on Pinterest

SwearNet’s Greasy Little Summer Photo Contest

Greasy photo contest

Put down your Pokefuck Go app and go spend some REAL time outside!  Whether it’s a liquor picnic at the beach, extreme dirty burger BBQing, or a piss jug road trip, we want to see photos of how you enjoy the GREASY outdoors.

Our photo contest starts today – and you have three weeks to upload your photo.  After that, tell your arsehole friends that they have one week to vote for your picture.  The person with the most votes will win a DECENT prize pack, plus a one-year subscription to SwearNet!  Runners-up will also receive SwearNet subs.

You can read the full cocksucking contest details and enter by clicking here.

 

Prize pack for the photo contest.

Win a RARE SwearNet cap, Dirty Burger apron, a beer coozie, a Green Bastard t-shirt, and a DECENT signed picture from the Boys. Plus – one free fucking year of SwearNet!

Summertime, and the living is GREASY!

Share this shit! Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on RedditShare on Google+Share on TumblrShare on StumbleUponPin on Pinterest

DEAR JULIAN: Send Us Your Goddamn Problems!

Get Julian's advice!

Julian’s ready to pour a few drinks and share some advice on an upcoming edition of Dear Julian.  Having trouble in your relationship?  Planning a grocery store robbery to get food for your friend’s wedding and need help with logistics?  You have problems, Julian has solutions.

Post your problems in the comment section below.  If you use his advice, that’s fine.  If you don’t, he really doesn’t give a fuck.

Share this shit! Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on RedditShare on Google+Share on TumblrShare on StumbleUponPin on Pinterest

New at swearnet.com: TPB Podcast Episode 48 – Happy Fucking Canada Day!

The Boys celebrate Canada Day

The drinks are flowing and the Boys are celebrating Canada Day!  On the newest Trailer Park Boys Podcast, the Boys invite Jacob from whatever fucking planet he’s from, to join them in Ricky’s trailer for some pizza and BIG GREASY DONAIRS.

Ricky shares 36 delightful facts about Canada, including the reason Canada receives thousands of goddamn tulips from The Netherlands every year, Canadian Jungle Pizza, and how the great CANADAMAN founded the country.

The Boys also discuss the most fucked up things they’ve ever banged, and why the residents of Sunnyvale need to fear zombie dogs!

This episode is brought to you by the Trailer Park Boys official merch store, and Liquormen’s Ol’ Dirty Canadian Whisky!

Share this shit! Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on RedditShare on Google+Share on TumblrShare on StumbleUponPin on Pinterest

New at swearnet.com: The Cocktale Hour Part 2

CS - Cocktale Hour pt2

Svetlana and Vivian, your two favourite Euro-sluts, are back with another Cocktale Hour!  This week’s topic: Sex on the Beach, both the drink, and the act of actually banging on the beach (which both Svetlana and Vivian have done many, MANY times… greasy).  They also present the Sex Fact of the Day and answer viewer questions.  PLUS:  Vivian shares a fucking terrifying story about a trip to the park.

Be sure to leave your questions in the comment section for future instalments of the Cocktale Hour!

Share this shit! Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on RedditShare on Google+Share on TumblrShare on StumbleUponPin on Pinterest

New at swearnet.com: TPB11 On Set Part 2 – Decent Idea

Bubbles has a DECENT business idea

The camera dicks just won’t leave Bubbles alone.  In his down time, Bubbles has been working on a DECENT business idea with three simple ingredients – a go-cart, a trailer, and fuckin’ Bubbles.  If it goes his way, he’ll have enough cash to buy his kitties the BEST cat food there is.  Just don’t tell anyone about it – including Ricky, Julian, or those Dragons’ Den dicks!

Share this shit! Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on RedditShare on Google+Share on TumblrShare on StumbleUponPin on Pinterest

Trippin’ with Leigh – Indiegogo campaign is now LIVE!

We’re ready to start Trippin’ with Leigh, but we need your help!

Trailer Park Boys actor Leigh MacInnis will be travelling across Peru to document his hallucinogenic trips and shamanic experiences in the jungle… but we need to raise money to help fund the trip to Peru! The Indiegogo campaign to raise funds to complete the film is now LIVE at http://igg.me/at/trippinwithleigh/x/10399239

What the fuck is in it for me, you ask?! As well as helping to fund this exciting documentary, there are many unique and amazing perks available, including shout-outs on our upcoming SWEARBLOG WALL OF FAME, t-shirts, photos, and the paintings Leigh created while on an acid trip!

Trippin with Leigh acid paintings

Once completed, the pilot will free to view at www.swearnet.com, and we will also be cutting together a DVD of the trip, which will be available through the official Trailer Park Boys store TPBstore.com. We only have thirty days to raise money, so please donate whatever you can, and spread the word among your friends!

Share this shit! Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on RedditShare on Google+Share on TumblrShare on StumbleUponPin on Pinterest

New at swearnet.com: Holy fuck, it’s the Offworld Cookery special!

Offworld Cookery at SwearNetPraise be, we have a special Offworld Cookery episode for you – and this one is FUCKED!!! This week, Jesus Christ Himself (or it might be Chico in a shit wig) cooks a heavenly feast with the aid of holy wine, a burning bush, and a traditional Roman dick spoon!

If you pray hard enough to God/Jesus/Santa, there might be more Offworld Cookery adventures coming to swearnet.com in the future….

Share this shit! Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on RedditShare on Google+Share on TumblrShare on StumbleUponPin on Pinterest