The camera dicks are back in Sunnyvale! The pricks at SwearNet.com want to have some “Ask Me Fucking Anythings” with the idiot residents of the park.
Have questions for any of the people in the mugshots above? Write them in the comment section, and we’ll be sure to bother the fuck out of them… and try to capture it on camera!
Dear Randy,
What makes Cheeseburgers soooo fuckin sexy?
Dear Ricky,
You are looking fit as fuck. It’s very sexy. What is your secret? Whatever it is, it is fucking working! Can’t wait to see you in Miliwakenee in August.
That question will get you stuffed, Keshia.
Dear Conky,
I have a puppet fetish and want to cram my fist straight up your arse. My question is, why do you have such a fucking problem with Ricky ? And is that something you’d be into ?
Thanks,
Foul Mouthed Fucking Chimney Sweep
Dear Margarette,how ever you spell your fuckin name,,,,which one of the boy,s go you really want to bone,,,,,which one do you really want to de-bone….
Dear Corey,
Why bother?
didnt you ask me that once?
Yes I did! You wouldn’t tell me how many pennies you can fit in your urethra
Dear Chipper,
why are you such a dick and fuck shit up all the time?
Dear Corey and Jacob,
why do you 2 dicks fuck things up for Ricky, Julian and Bubbles all the time?
Dear Julian why does Ricky think the Earth is flat? I seen some of those Flat Earth videos on youtube and they are fucked but they also kind of make sense and have allot of proof from sending up balloons with cameras and shit like that. Would you ever consider watching those Flat Earth videos with Ricky?
Dear Sarah,
You are a versatile and talented lady, beautiful too. What is your favorite way to spend the day in Sunnyvale provided the boys aren’t fucking things up too much?
Dear Ricky,
What is your last name? Just wondering if you, Julian, Bubbles and Randy even have a last name. It’s weird that isn’t never come up even in court.
Dear Ricky,
I have noticed you used to vape, now we don’t see you smoke or use a vape anymore, did you use the vape to help quit smoking? Also what in the fuck is with you licking your fingers like a madman after eating a chip then diving back in? WTF man!
Yeah, that’s way worse than double dipping — so bad I don’t even think there’s a name for it.
Dear Ricky,
I have notice you don’t smoke anymore and I have seen you vape on podcashs’. Did you use the vape to help quit smoking? Also what in the fuck is with the way you suck your fingers after every chip then dive back into the bowl for more? That is fucked man.
Mr. Lahey, what does the liquor tell us about the future?
Dear Julian, Could you use a new business partner? I’m a smart, single woman. I really think I could bring a fresh perspective and lots of good ideas. I could also be a very good financial advisor. Cheers bud 😀
Hey Ricky,
evryone knows your the smartest guy in the park, but why do you think people think your retarded
Julian.
Do you got any new money makning scemes in the works, ones where you dont fuck over your freinds.
…thanks swayze
Randers.
Are you still bangin ted. how longs he in prison for. oh and next time you have to chopsticks staple them to each side of your mouth you walrus.
cheers man
Hey Cory.
Are you still running that convenience store? how its going. also are you still doing any of that raping. can you do some free style for me.
cheers BUD
Corey is still Canada’s best freestyle RAPIST
Sarah
whats up with you “falling in love” with the guys ricky makes basicly his slaves, cory, trevor, and even jacob. do you think its something like pity you have towards them that makes you attracted to them.
thanks
hey jacob have you paid julian that $5 for the donair. if not get the fuck out of here and go pay him
Hey Dion,
Why are they always reading your questions on AMFA? You slipping them some hash coins? 🤣
These questions are for Bubbles and Ricky. I am enamored with you,Bubbles. I love cats,also. Do you think we could collect carts together sometime? This question is for Ricky. I’ve seen you light up everything under the sun. I just wonder, have you ever lit one of your own farts? After all the beer and pepperoni and pot you could start a bonfire with it. P.S. Julian your perfect, thank you……sigh.
Conkey what the fuck are you doing back in the park. if your going for ricky, just remember… he passes out alot
marguerite
Whos Your Favourite Resident of sunnyvale. and who do you hate most
hey bubs
ok so why do you wear those fuckning glasses. you cant see 5ft in front of you.whats your vision like without them
Lahey.
do you still love motel. you were great looking after him when you thought you were ricks old man. so do you still like him you drunk fuck
Sarah, would you ever consider getting back together with Ricky?
Dear Conky,
Is it possible you’ll have kids that will hate and fuck with Ricky as much as you do? Also,you need to make more Swaezy stabes at Jullian
Dear Conky,
Fuck you.
Dear Cory,
Could you please show the viewers of Swearnet some of your dance moves?
Bubbles, would you rather never play guitar again or never take care of kitties for the rest of your life?
Hey Ricky, my brother Dion is always commenting on your stuff. Can you tell him to Fuck Off?
Bubbles, Ricky and Julian
How come you all are so different but you all seem to be the best of friends? What made you like each other?
Cheers
Bubbles,
I know kitty’s are adorable but what’s the reason you like them for, if they became endangered what would you do!?
Hey randers
If you could design a cheeseburger what would you put in it? And what would you call it?
Sarah, if you had to kill one, fuck one and marry one,
Who would you pick and why
Out of Ricky, Bubbles and Julian
Dear Julian,
What’s some excersise tips?
Cheers
Hey bubs – I know from “ask Julian” that you only bang models but have you ever got down and dirty with any ladies from the park ie Lucy , Sarah or even margarita thanks Darren from uk
randy whats your record on cheeseburgers ate in one day?
do bubbles kitties steal (nibble) ricky’s pepperoni cocks?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how much of a fuckhead is Pat Roach, and has his fuckheadedness increased or decreased over these past few years?
How’s it fuckin goin boys? Julian, if you had to bang Schwarzenegger, Stallone or Corey to save your Grandma’s trailer (I don’t know, Lahey is gunna torch it otherwise or some other fucked up shit, you know how much he wants to see you bang) which one would you pick? Corey is already kind of like a chick but I don’t know if I could bang someone that dumb, he’d fuck it up one way or another.
Ricky, who was the best fucking pet, Orangie, willy, or CoolNow?
Hey Conky
I thought you were fucking dead you stupid son of a whore! Why do you keep fucking with the boys? You better look the fuck out Rickys gonna end you for good.
Fuck with Randy and Lahey those shit twisting bastards and maybe you can make it up to the boys.
What do you think Conky?
TPB4Life
Dear Jim Lahey
Why did you become a cop rather than teach theater and literature? Was it your shit destiny?
Yo Ricky
You have been through a whole lot over the years in Sunnyvale. You have been shot multiple times. You have been electrocuted. You burned down Rays trailer. You have grown the best dope ever smoked and, you are now a gramfather. How does it feel to be the coolest guy in Sunnyvale?
I don’t know why Lahey and Randy keep fucking with you. Why cant they just FUCK OFF? I don’t think they remember what goes around is all around.
Keep up the good work boys,
TPB4Life
Dear Sarah,
After all these years dealing with stress in the park, how do manage to stay so young? Your face seriously hasn’t aged since the early 2000s. What’s your secret?
Sincerely,
allisonhope
Conky. Have you ever met Bobby Turkalino and what are your thoughts on him?
Cheers,
Ryan
Dear Jim.
You are a huge inspiration of mine. If there is one shitism of yours that you want everyone to remember when you’re gone, what is it? Which shit-quote means the most to you?
Thanks a lot,
Ryan,
Your fan from England.
dear Bubbles. have you ever heard any flamenco guitar (spanish guitar)? the most famous example is paco de lucia. you seem to know a very wide variety of music
Conky, 2 part question. 1. Whats the biggest fist you’ve ever taken 2. Do you think would have been better with Seabastian and all that honey oil?
Conky,
What has nine lives, one joke and enjoys a good ass-fisting? And would you mind being funnier in Season 12 by spending the rest of them?
Jacob, how in the fuck did your nuts recover from that dog bite for to make baby Mo? Do you now have one good ball?
Marguerite, did you plan to stab Corey with nail clippers or would you have ‘worked-off’ your debt if you didn’t have anything to stab the little peckerwoods with?
Conky, ever had a non-human fist inside ya?
A 2 part question for both Randy and Lahey:
1) we’ve seen Indianapolis Jones and Flight of the Bumblecock but what are your favourite outfits from your many, many plays at the Blandford recreation centre?
2) We know you two have a sawhorse and sex swing, what other shit are you into in the bedroom?
Ricky, I live in the UK and we are just starting to get some of the really nice Cali weed (like Cookies and Cream) imported here but its sooo fucking expensive (over $1000 CAD an oz.). What’s the most expensive weed you’ve ever bought? and was it worth the cost?
Julian, I live in the UK and you can occasionally get really nice Cali weed here but its well over $1000 CAD an ounce. Any chance of you working out a greasy international smuggling deal with Snoop and Sammy OG?
Hi Sarah, before I praise your smarts let me tell first compliment you being the hottest person in the park 😉
Now onto my question: apart from Bubbles you are clearly the smartest person in the park – do you ever see yourself owning and/or running Sunnyvale? You managed the Dirty Dancer, Julians Sports Bar and Gym and Mystic Fingers so surely it would be easy for you and you would do a better job than Barb, Julian, Drunkey-the-Fuck-clown or that cavedick Sam?
Bubs, I know you have had trouble with kids being mean to you and bullying you because of your glasses, calling you a nerd etc. What advice would you give to a kid who is having trouble with some bullies?
Cory, what’s up with the toothpick bud? Is it an oral fixation or do you just really miss hanging out with Trevor?
Lahey, we’ve heard you speak of Shit-hawks, Shit-ropes, Shit-blizzards and even the eye of the Shit-icane… but which of these (or any other) Shit-isms should be avoided above all others and why?
Dear bubbles, Were you born with all the awesomeness that you have or was it something you learned over time? And if so how could I be become as awesome as you are and learn how to control my bird when I get nervous? It can become a problem when your bird goes up in the wrong place.
Dear ricky, what is the most fucked thing you have ever seen, done, or experienced while tripping on shrooms/lsd?
Dear Marguerite,
I hear tell that you come from a long line of coal mining swish drinkers. Care to share an old family swish recipe? Is swish best straight up, on the rocks, or with coke? And by coke, I mean the brown carbonated beverage, not that other stuff.
To Jim Lahey: What was your proudest moment of being a police officer before the boys and George Green fucked all that up for you? p.s I bet you cant finish that bottle your drinking.
To Ricky: Hey buddy, I know you have had a lot of pets and a lot of good times partying with all sorts of animals. So I want to know in your experience which animals party the hardest? Cheers bud.
To Bubbles: Hey Bubs, like you I live in a sed. Mine has a bit more space than yours but your shed has all the fuckin bells and whistles and shit. What can I do to make this place cooler and more practical like your lovely home? Cheers bud.
To Randy: Hey Randy, I noticed that if I look at you in the right light and squint my eyes you kind of look a little bit like that fat drunk fuck Pat Roach from swearnet. What is your opinion of that stupid dick? Thanks bud.
To Lahey: What’s the craziest story from your police officer days? Did you learn anything life lessons dealing with common Shit-izens outside of the park?
To Ricky: What is for the be the best weed you have ever smoked and what did you do after you were baked as fuck on it?
To Bubbles: Where do you come up with all the names for your kitties? You have to be a kitty naming genius to think up something like Gary Lazer-eyes!
Dear Sarah,
How does it feel to be the prettiest girl in the park? Your make up and hair is always on point. Marry me. <3
To Julian: Hey bud, can you think back to your childhood and remember your first scheme/job? Were Ricky and Bubs involved? I know you were piss drunk in those days so I understand if you forget details but could you tell the story please? Cheers bud.
To Corey and Jacob: You guys seem to play a lot of video games which is awesome dude. What games do you like the best (shooters, racing games, etc)? Do you have a favorite of all time?
To Conky:: Hey Conky, why can you not be killed? Every time we think you are gone you piece yourself together and come back. Are you involved in some back magic shit or what?
To Jacob: Hey Jacob, when is the last time you talked to your brother Thomas? Has he met little Motel yet? Cheers bud.
To Corey: Hey man, where the fuck are you living these days? Do you still have your own trailer or do you just bum around the park? Cheers buddy.
To Sarah: Hi Sarah, I was wondering since Lucy left who has been your best friend in the park? Thanks hun.
To Marguerite: Hey Marg, I was wondering what you and all the retired residents of Sunnyvale think of all the unlawful activity in the park? Is there too many shootings and fights? Thankyou.
Margurite, what do you think about polititians and trailer park supervisors?
Dear Bubbles, i know its a sensitive topic however, when you were deserted as a little guy, at Sunnyvale, did you used to live in an actual house? How far away was it from the park? What is your 1st and last name? Surley, it’s not bubbles??? I think you fucking rock, and I would love to come to the park to meet you, get drunk and listen to Rush!!! Got yet Belly!!!
Jim
Hey conkey , I hear “Chuckie” from Childs Play really wants to meet you….says he could give you some handy tips. What are your thoughts on this guy?
Dear Marguerite,
Are you into American dudes at all? I have several televisions and I hear that you roll a mean joint. I was thinking we could get high, watch some tv and then maybe get some dirty stuff going if you’re interested.
Jullian – If you could breed a hybrid animal of any two species, what two would you choose?
Randy – If you could change one part of your appearance, what would it be?
Corey – Do fishes see water?
Sarah – 5 years ago, how do you think you would have answered the question: where do you see yourself in 5 years? If its not where you are today, are you happy with the changes?
Ricky – Would you spend 10 years in jail for $2 million at the end? If not, how much would it take?
Jacob – What one piece of advice would you give to your younger self?
Conky – If you could transform into any animal, what animal would you want to be?
Margaret – You’re being held at gunpoint, and the gunman asks you for one reason why he shouldn’t pull the trigger, what do you tell him?
Bubbles – You’re playing poker with a tiger. You’re holding 10c 9c and the flop is 9d 7h Jc. You notice that the tiger’s tail is thrashing round violently, and it seems to be completely unaware that it’s doing so, like an involuntary action. It stares at you hypnotically and slowly places a minimum bet. Do you fold, call, raise, or run screaming?
Lahey – If you could live the life of any person in the world (living or dead), who would you choose?
Dear Ricky, what did you do to land your ass in jail for the first time?
Dear Mr. Lahey, what would you do if you suddenly woke up, finding yourself in the body of a robot. How would you react, and would you continue fighting the shit storms?
Hi Bubbles. I too am a Rush fan. Do you know any other rush songs besides loser to the Heart? Another favorite of mine is Lime light, I think the guitar part is quite beautiful, and i love singing along.
Dear Jacob, what’s the best way to prepare salamanders?
Dear Sarah, how did you feel after shooting an AMFA last year that swearnet dicks never aired?
Dear Bubbles,
Would you consider releasing a compilation of the songs you’ve performed with Axl Rose, Alex Lifeson, Snoop, etc? This would involve a lot of legal shit, but it could raise some cash for your favorite kitty charity.
Dear twiggy alienman (Jacob),
When the fuck in Rickey gonna let Corey go to fucking family day with you? Also do think you could AQUIRE me some off Rickeys 5 hour denergy?
Fucking Dear Ricky,
How do you for to make your 5 hour denergy?
Also could you send me some? I think it will help when I’m sleeping in my car.
Fucking Dear Ricky,
How do you fucking for to make your 5 hour denergy?
Also could you fucking send me some please? I think it will help when I’m sleeping in my fucking car.
Dear Sarah,
I’ve enjoyed watching you in the park all these years, and you are very intelligent and seem to have a mind for business. If money were no object, and you could start a business on your own, what would it be? And also, it’s been a long time since we’ve seen you getting any action. You and T always work well together, any chance you will hook up?
Dear Randy,
How do you keep from getting crud in your belly button. I have this problem and I could really use some advice! Also you are awesome, keep it up bud!
yours,
Tia
Bubbles, How do you train your kitties to stop playing with your hands when you are practicing a song? Every kittie I have ever met loves to fuck with my hands when I play.
Bubbles, How do you train your kitties to stop playing with your hands when you are practicing a song? Every kittie I have ever met loves to fuck with my hands when I play.
Dear Bubbles. Iam your biggest fan By the way. Do you think Bubbles and the shitrockers and Guns n Roses will ever tour together? Your bud, Noah
Dear Rickey, How wicked would it be if you put a racecar motor in your Newyorker. Shes already pretty quick but imagine the cock power bud!!
Dear Randy, Did you ever go kayaking with Philideplhia collins? how was it bud?