Tag Archive for advice

Julian’s led a fucked-up life, but he’s a survivor and knows a thing or two about love, money, and relationships. If you use his advice, that’s fine. But if you don’t, he really doesn’t give a fuck.
 

New at swearnet.com – A Pig Named Bubbles and Corn Holes

 

This week Ricky’s movie theatre etiquette is called into question and whats with the parents at those movies?!!… a little touchy.
Was Adam Ant a person or one of the fucking Ants? Do sperm shots for back pain work, don’t fuck with gasoline or a marsupial with three openings and what are the merits of corn hole wiping?!

Catch the full episode at SwearNet.com!

New on swearnet.com – Fuckin’ Modern Technology!

Julian answers fan questions

On today’s episode of Dear Julian, we get some advice on surviving an early-mid-life crisis, how to trick the stupid fucking cops that pull you over for smoking dope, and how to advertise greasy new bars!

We also get Julian’s take on modern fuckin technology.  How is it impacting his line of work?  What are his opinions of hackers?  Now that everyone has goddamn cameras in their pockets, is it hard to pull off greasy shit?

PLUS: We learn some serious rum lessons, particularly when it comes to driving!

New on swearnet.com – Avoiding Whisky Dick

Julian sips on rum and reads fan questions

Julian is in a positive mood for today’s episode of Dear Julian, despite some of you pricks deciding it’s ok to call him Swayze!

Julian sips on a rum and coke and answers fan questions about whisky-dick threesomes, lending money to friends who want to make a rap record, the sexiest places for ladies to get tattoos, and much more.

He also explains why his last name is secret (and it’s NOT fucking SWAYZE).

PLUS: How in the fuck can a Maritimer like Jules hate seafood?!

DEAR JULIAN – Questions, Let’s Go!

questions, let's go

The camera dicks at SwearNet are getting ready to shoot some more episodes of Dear Julian!

We got the rum, got the mix, got the cubes, got the muscles, there’s just one fucking problem.  We’re out of questions!  Write your shit in the comment section below!

Remember, Julian has been doing this show for almost two years now so he has seen it all.  The SwearNet dicks will pick out the best, most unique questions… Jules has answered a thousand fucking questions about “pacing yourself on rum all day,” so try to make er original and we’ll be sure to pass your Q onto the man himself.

Questions, let’s go!

 

New on swearnet.com – Dream a Little Liquor Dream of Me

Lahey answers a call during a late-night Liquor Stories taping

The latest episode of Liquor Stories with James Lahey is a journey so deep into Lahey’s liquor brain that you may fear you will never return to your normal life.

After having a late-night “epissany,” Lahey wakes from a deep sleep and decides he needs to rush to SwearNet studios to record a late-night Liquor Stories to impart a mountain of shit-knowledge on the SwearNet audience.

No Chipper, no problem, Lahey can operate his own camera. He proceeds to launch into a dimly-lit magnum shit-opus of epic proportions. Old Man Liquor offers rules to live by, and his unstoppable train of thought is only interrupted twice – once for a phone call, and once for a mean fuckin’ swig of Liquormen’s Ol’ Dirty Canadian Whisky.

New on swearnet.com – How the Fuck to Make Swish

Bubbles and Julian explain how to make swish

Season Two of Dear Julian has been featuring some DECENT guests, none more decent than one of Julian’s best friends on the planet, Bubbles!

On today’s episode, Julian and Bubbles answer fan questions on a number of fucked topics, including the origins of the Green Bastard, how to rip off EI (Employment Insurance, or pogey to most), and the Boys share some stories about Randy as a young dickhead.  You’ll also get a detailed set of instructions for making DIRTY OLD SWISH.

Plus: Ever wonder where Bubbles gets all of his fucking amazing shirts?  Watch this episode to find out!

Send Us Your Fucking Questions

Dear Julian needs your questions

Alright dickheads, we want more questions for upcoming episodes of Dear Julian.

Since we started the second season, Bubbles and Ricky seem to have found their way onto the set.  Julian doesn’t want them around all the fucking time, it’s still called DEAR JULIAN for fuck sakes, but you never know when they might show up.  So include questions for those two shit weasels too if it tickles your fucking fancy!

Trying to figure out how to fuck over the tax man this tax season?

Want to learn how to roll the perfect six-paper joint?

Can’t stop your kitty from humping your fucking leg?

Comment below!

New on swearnet.com – Don’t Be Betting on Fuckin’ Hobo Fights

Ricky and Bubbles join the set of Dear Julian

It’s a new season of Dear Julian!  Julian made a few changes – he got a new table, and he got two new dickhead co-hosts!

Ricky, Julian, and Bubbles tackle fan questions ranging from “how to pass a piss test” to the morality of hobo fights.  One fan asks if Ricky will ever get into the licensed medicinal marijuana business, and a question about winter school cancellations leads to a story about Bubbles getting his testicles (or was it his tongue) stuck to a flag pole.

Oh – and the Boys pass on the most important advice perhaps ever given – don’t, under any circumstances, fuck with Tie Domi!